Aging is Awesome!
I tuned sixty recently and I had a whole week of celebrating and what I can share with you is Aging is Awesome. Why do I say this, you ask? Simply: aging is the best excuse for living life on your own terms, aging is a reason to finally lean into who you are and ask for the future that you most want.
Whether it is grappling with the reality of turning sixty, or fifty five or seventy, each one of us will have a moment where we can no longer deny that we are aging. My moment was actually not a moment, it was a series of reality checks and a cascade of changes in my body that signalled a new stage of life had started. The small spider belly I had always been blessed with became a stubborn tire around my middle. Try as I might, this newfound midsection seemed resistant to dieting, pilates, weight training and endurance training. With the tire came mood changes and hot flashes, and moments of irrational anger. Menopause my doctor claimed, can be a “tough time for certain women.” Well that statement turned out to be the understatement of this decade, however that’s for another post.
With these changes came mental shifts. I needed more alone time. I found myself saying no to going to the Christmas craft fair, even though my friends were going. In the past I would have guilted myself into spending the afternoon with my girlfriends, even though I don’t like crowds or crafts. In my fifties, I began to trust that I knew what I needed and then follow that knowing.
At first, in order to cope with the challenges of menopause, I needed to really pay attention to my energy output and situations that overstimulated my nervous system. As I got closer to the big sixty though, the motivation to do what I most want to do feels urgent. How much more time do I have to hike big mountains, to start that book I’ve been trying to write for the last few years, to spend an entire weekend with my adult children?
On the work front, I want to share what I have been learning and to make sure that I take good care of the people who are listening to me. This means listening more deeply to my audience, whether they are listening to my podcast Inflection Time, or following my social posts. I want to stop spending so much time travelling for work. This is why launching a podcast became important. Having conversations that make me think, and perhaps shift another person’s perspective is exciting, and with a podcast I don’t always have to travel, sleep in a hotel room, and deal with airport delays.
Aging can be liberating, because putting yourself first is also about letting go of people, activities and stuff that is no longer serving you. If you have outgrown friends, find the courage to let go with love. If the work you are doing isn’t fulfilling you, can you find a way to add a dimension to your work that is more rewarding. If you need time alone, take it. Aging is giving me the courage to live life in a way that is truly aligned to what I need to be at my best. I wish I had more courage in my forties to say no, to get focussed on projects that were inspiring me. But I am glad I have clarity now, and I consider that clarity a gift of aging. Aging is awesome!